ANGER: Ten Ways to Defeat It

1 - Seek refuge with Allah from the Devil:

Sulayman bin Sard narrated:

"I was sitting with the Prophet, when two men began slandering one another. One of them was red in the face, and the veins on his neck were standing out. The Prophet said: "I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said: "I seek refuge with Allah from the Devil," what he feels would go away.'"

['Fath al-Bari'; 6/337]

The Messenger of Allah said:

"If a man gets angry and says: "I seek refuge with Allah," his anger will go away."

['Sahih al-Jami'; # 695]


2 - Remain silent:

The Messenger of Allah said:

"If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent."

['Sahih al-Jami'; # 693]


3 - Sit down or lie down:

"Abu Dharr was taking his camels to drink at a trough that he owned, when some other people came along and said to one another: "Who can compete with Abu Dharr in bringing animals to drink and make his hair stand on end?" A man said: "I can." So, he brought his animals and competed with Abu Dharr and ended up breaking the trough.Abu Dharr was standing when he saw this, so, he sat down, then he laid down. Someone asked him: "O Abu Dharr, why did you sit down then lie down?" He said: "The Messenger of Allah said: "If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so that his anger will go away. If iit does not go away, let him lie down."""

[Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad (5/152) and 'Sahih al-Jami' (694)]

al-Imam al-Khattabi said: "One who is standing is in a position to strike and destroy, while the one who is sitting is less likely to do that, and the one who is lying down can do neither. It is possible that the Prophet told the angry person to sit down or lie down so that he would not do something that he would later regret, and Allah Knows best."

['Ma'alim as-Sunan'; 5/141]


4 - Smile:

Anas bin Malik narrated:

"I was walking with the Messenger of Allah, and he was wearing a Najrani cloak with a rough collar. A bedouin came and seized him roughly by the edge of his cloak, and I saw the marks left on his neck by the collar. Then the bedouin ordered him to give him some of the wealth of Allah that he had. The Prophet turned to him and smiled, then ordered that he should be given something."

['Fath al-Bari'; 10/375]


5 - Remember the advice of the Prophet:

Abu Hurayrah narrated:

"A man said to the Prophet: "Advise me." He said: "Do not become angry." The man repeated his request several times, and each time the Prophet said to him: "Do not become angry.""

['Fath al-Bari'; 10/456]

According to another narration, the man later said: "I thought about what the Prophet said, and I realized that anger combines all kinds of evil."

[Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad; 5/373]


6 - Remember the high status of those who control themselves:

The Messenger of Allah said:

"The strong man is not the one who can overpower others. Rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry."

[Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad; 2/236, and it is authentic]

The Messenger of Allah also said:

"The strongest man is the one who, when he gets angry and his face reddens and his hackles rise, is able to defeat his anger."

['Sahih al-Jami'; # 3859]

Anas bin Malik narrated

"The Messenger of Allah passed by some people who were wrestling. He asked: "What is this?" They said: "So-and-so is the strongest; he can beat anybody." The Messenger of Allah then said: "Shall I not tell you who is even stronger then him? The man who, when he is mistreated by another, controls his anger, has defeated his own devil and the devil of the one who made him angry.""

['Fath al-Bari'; 10/519]


7 - Rewards for those who control their anger:

The Messenger of Allah said:

"Do not become angry, and Paradise is yours."

['Sahih al-Jami'; # 7374]

The Messenger of Allah said:

"Whoever controls his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allah will call him before all of mankind on the Day of Resurrection, and will let him choose of the Hur al-'Ayn whoever he wants."

[Reported by Abu Dawud (4777), and it is in 'Sahih al-Jami' (6518)]


8 - Remember that resisting anger is one of the signs of righteousness:

{"And march forth in the way to forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as the heavens and the earth, prepared for the righteous; those who spend in prosperity and in adversity, repress anger, and pardon men. Verily, Allah loves the good-doers."} [Al 'Imran; 134]


9 - Submit to reminders:

Ibn 'Abbas narrated:

"A man sought permission to speak to 'Umar bin al-Khattab, then he said: "O Ibn al-Khattab, you are not giving us much and you are not judging fairly between us." 'Umar was so angry that he was about to attack the man, but al-Hurr bin Qays - who was one of those present - said: "O Commander of the Believers! Allah said to His Prophet: {"Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish."} [al-A'raf; 199], and this man is one of the foolish." By Allah, 'Umar could go no further after al-Hurr had recited this verse to him, as he a man who was careful to adhere to the Book of Allah."

['Fath al-Bari'; 4/304]

...as opposed to how one of the hypocrites reacted when one of the Companions said to him: "Seek refuge with Allah from the Devil," So, he replied: "Do you think I am crazy? Go away!"

['Fath al-Bari'; 1/465]


10 - Remember the bad effects of anger:

'Alqamah bin Wa'il narrated:

"My father said to me: "I was sitting with the Prophet, when a man came to him leading another man by a rope. He said: "O Messenger of Allah, this man killed my brother." The Messenger of Allah asked him, "Did you kill him?" He said: "Yes, I killed him." He asked: "How did you kill him?" He said: "He and I were hitting a tree to make the leaves fall for animal feed, and then he insulted me, so I struck him on the side of the head with an axe and killed him.""

['Sahih Muslim'; # 1307]




Before I reverted to Islam (when I still a Buddhist), I was a very bad tempered person. I was angry at this and angry at that. I knew my bad temper will get me no where good. My mother at that time kept reminding me that. I knew I had to change.

I read many books on anger management and later was able to control it. Controlling anger gives us more control on our own self. Although I still have some temper left in me, Islam teaches me what to do when angry. Lets defeat anger once and for all.

"Know that not everyone is suitable to be your friend..."

1 - Allah Said:

{"Ah! Woe to me! If only I had never taken so-and-so as a friend! He indeed led me astray from the Reminder after it had come to me!"}

[al-Furqan; 28-29]


2 - The Messenger of Allah said:

"A person is upon the way of his friend. So, let one of you look to whom he keeps as a friend."

['Sahih al-Jami'' (3545) and 'as-Silsilah as-Sahihah' (927)]


3 - 'Abdullah bin Ahmad bin Hambal said:

"My father went out to Tarsus on foot, and he perfored two or three Hajjs on foot, and he was the most patient of people upon being alone."

['Tarjamat al-Imam Ahmad'; p. 18]


4 - Ibn al-Qayyim said:

"Know that the greatest of losses is for you to be preoccupied with one who will bring you nothing but a loss in your time with Allah - the Mighty and Majestic - and being cut off from Him, a wasting your time with the person, a weakening of your energy, and the dispersing of your resolve. So, if you are tested with this - and you must be tested with this - deal with him according to how Allah would wish, and be patient with him as much as possible. Get closer to Allah and His Pleasure by way of this person, and make your getting together with him something to benefit from, not something to incur a loss from. Be with him as if you are a man who is on a road who was stopped by another man, who then asks you to take him on your journey. Make sure that you are the one who gives him a ride, and that he is not the one giving you the ride. If he refuses, and there is nothing to gain from travelling with him, do not stop for him, bid him farewell, and do not even turn back to look at him, as he is a highway robber, regardless of who he really is.

So, save your heart, be wary of how you spend your days and nights, and do not let the Sun set before you arrive at your destination."

['al-Wabil as-Sayyib'; p. 45]


5 - Ibn Jama'ah said:

"So, it is upon the student of knowledge to abandon socialization, as abandoning it is from the most important things that the student of knowledge must do - let alone with members of the opposite gender - especially with those who spend most of their time in play, and spend little of their time in thought, as the nature of individuals can rob you.

The harms of socialization include the passing of life without any benefit, as well as the decline of wealth and religious practice, if this socialization were to occur with the wrong people.

The student of knowledge should not mix except with either those who he can benefit, or can benefit from. And if he is offered the friendship of one who will waste his time with him, will not benefit him, will not benefit from him, and will not assist him in reaching his objective, he should politely end the relationship from the start before it progresses to something deeper, as when something becomes established, it becomes more difficult to change it. There is a phrase that is constantly on the tongues of the Fuqaha': 'Repelling something is easier than removing it.'

So, if he requires someone to befriend, let that person be righteous, religious, pious, wary, intelligent, full of benefit, having little evil, good at complying, rarely conflicting, reminding him if he forgets, cooperating with him when he is reminded, helpful if he is in need, and comforting if he is in distress."

['Tadhkirat as-Sami' wal-Mutakallim'; p. 83]


6 - Ibn Qudamah al-Maqdisi said:

"Know that not everyone is suitable to be your friend. You must verify that this potential friend has the neccessary characteristics that make friendship with him something to be desired. The one you seek to befriend must have five characteristics:
He must be intelligent, as there is no good in befriending an idiot, as he will only harm you when he wants to benefit you. By intelligent, we mean one who understands things as they are, either on his own, or if they are explained to him;
He must have good manners, and this is a must. One who is simply intelligent might be overcome by anger or desire, and obey his desire. Thus, there would be no benefit in befriending him;
He must not be a fasiq, as such a person would not fear Allah, and whoever does not fear Allah cannot be trusted;
He must not be an innovator, as his abundance of innovation is feared from befriending him;
He should not be eager for the dunya."
['Mukhtasar Minhaj al-Qasidin'; p. 126-132]

A reminder for me and you. Pick our friends well!

(from Kalamullah)

Melayu bukan muslim

'Jangan keliru antara Melayu dan Islam. Melayu itu bangsa, Islam tu agama......'
This already happen in Singapore. It already happen in Malaysia but because of our law most couples did not get married.

(klik to see the whole article)

Galaxy explosion in the Quran

Some of the things that happens out there cannot be seen with naked eyes or heard with our naked ears.

It have been known to man after the creation of the universe many galaxies are born and many dies. With the advancement of science and with the help of telescopes, we are able to understand our galaxy more.

What I want to share today is one of the Signs by Allah:
[Al-Rohman 55:37 "And when the heaven splitteth asunder and becometh rosy like paint"]

This verse was revealed about 1400-1500 years ago. At that time, not much about outer space are known to man. Today with technology we can understand this verse better. When the galaxies explode, they will form a rose shaped explosion.

For me this scientific miracle in the Quran proven the integrity of the Quran itself as words of the All-Mighty Allah S.W.T. Our Prophet S.A.W. could never thought of this himself and there are no gadgets or science at that time to see how the galaxy explodes. Maybe one day our sun will blow up resembling like the shape of the rose.

Note: The Noble Verse in Arabic says: "Fa-itha inshaqqati alssamao fakanat wardatan kaalddihani" "Wardatan" is derived from the root word "Warda", which literally means "rose" or "flower".

In the Arabic Noble Verse, "wardatan" was translated as "ROSY" above. The root word "WARDA" in Arabic LITERALLY means "ROSE" or "FLOWER". The "tan" at the end of "wardatan" is not part of the word. It is only an Arabic PUNCTUATION that only changes the sound of the word for grammatical rules.

It is pronounced as "ten", with the "a" being short. The reason why the above word was not written as "wardaten" is because in many parts of the world, the English word "ten" (number 10) is pronounced as "tin". Only the American-English pronounce the "e" as a short "a". Most of the world uses the British-English system and they pronounce the "e" as "i", and the "o" as it is, such as "stop" pronounced as "stope".

The American-English pronounces the "o" as a thick "a". Also, if we were to add two Arabic characters, "alif" and "noon" at the end of "warda", it would change the pronunciation to "taan" (wardataan), and it then becomes two "wardas"; plural.

Bertaklid tetapi anti kepada taklid

Kami pernah bertanya kepada seorang yang anti taqlid:
'Bagaimana kamu belajar bersolat?'

Dia menjawab:
'Melalui seorang yang mengajarnya kepada saya.'

Kami bertanya lagi:
'Adakah daripada al-Quran atau Hadith?'

Dia menjawab: 'Tidak'

Maka kamipun berkata kepadanya.
'Bukankah ini juga adalah taqlid kepada seorang yang mengajar kamu solat.'

Kalau sekiranya dia berkata:
'Saya cuma membaca sebuah buku karangan seorang ulamak pada zaman kini yang membahaskan mengenaii solat.'

Kami akan berkata:
'Ini juga taqlid kepada pengarang kitab tersebut.'

Adakalanya dia berkata, bertaqlid adalah bid'ah. Bila kita bertanya: 'Kenapa?'
Jawabnya:
'Kerana tidak pernah dilakukan oleh Rasulullah S.A.W. dan para sahabatnya, bahkan tidak pernah diperintahkan oleh syariat sebelum ini.'

Maka kami bertanya kepadanya:
'Bagaimana kamu tahu bahawa tidak pernah disebut?'
Dia menjawab:
'Aku mendengar Syeikh polan mengatakannya,'
Realitinya dia mendengar daripada lelaki tersebut. Bukankah ini juga taqlid?

Kenapalah wahai saudaraku, kamu anti kepada mengikut kepada seorang yang hidup pada zaman yang hampir dengan zaman Rasulullah S.A.W., yang mahir dalam selok bahasa Arab dan dalam memahami hadith Rasulullah S.A.W., kemudian kamu merelakan dirimu bertaqlid kepada seorang yang hidup pada zaman ini yang ilmu, kefahaman, warak dan takwanya tidak mencecah lebih daripada buku lali ulama terdahulu/silam?

P/s: Rujukan yang terbaik ialah al-Quran dan hadith2.
-Saya budak baru belajar, kalau salah tolong tunjukkan-

Tired....

Its been a very tiring week for me since I have 2 night classes this week. I kept on telling myself that its worth it. I hope my hard work will pay off when I see my students excel in their life and discipline later on.

This week I met with an Ustaz Azhar nearby my house at Kerinchi. I have some talk to him. He seems very knowledgeable. I hope to learn from him. At first we talked about the normal stuff (fikh issues) then about politics and politics in Islamic view. I am quite happy that my views is about the same as his. However I am quite sad when this conversation happen:

Ustaz: Awak biasanya belajar di mana?

Saya: Oh, jika saya sempat saya pergi kuliah-kuliah sekitar area KL. Contohnya di al-Khadeem ngan Hussein Yee. Kadang-kadag kat IIS di Setiawangsa.

Ustaz: Yang setiawangsa tu ok tapi Hussein Yee ni saya nasihatkan janganla... (sambil menggoyang-goyangkan kepala)

At that moment I was dunno wat to say already. So many questions is in my head. How can someone with Islamic knowledge like him say say such thing. How can you say bad things about another brother that helps to spread Islam? Have he ever met Hussein Yee.

I dont know wat to say so I say: 'Tak apa ustaz, biasanya saya ada buat rujukan.'

Again another Muslim is called a Wahabi. Usually those with not much of education will do so. What was running in my head was how can you label someone 'Wahabi' if you do not know what the word is? Watever shitty accusation of these people is not true at all. They say that wahabi say this and that. When I went to hear the 'kuliah' of the so called wahabi, I only find them preaching the al-Quran and Sunnah.

Even though sometimes it if different from the Shafie mazhab but they explained it clearly on the discussion among the Imams, scholars etc and the hadiths involved. I can only see al-sunnah wal jamaah here. No such thing as wahabi.

Dont these people know that the Syiahs have been using this word to label us the Sunnis? So that we will be scared and fall into their trap. The Syiahs trap.
Its so sad....

Anyway I would like to thank sis Aliya for this award:

The Rafflesia story

It was about a week ago when my course leader called me up and asked if I would like go to to Ulu Geroh, nearby Gopeng to see the Rafflesia plant. We actually went there before but only to find the flower to be destroyed maybe by animals. The last time we went we can only see the rafflesia buds.
Just to see the parasitic plant, we need to climb about an hour uphill through trails made by the local Semai people here. I nearly died climbing. And the route is full of insects and leeches.

So I agreed to follow him, on the way we met a man. His face looks clean and his hair is white. He looks like a foreigner but actually he is a Malay. He was alone and wanted to see the plant as well so the three of us went up the hill togather and Alhamdullilah, this time we are lucky to see one blooming. It takes about 9 months for the rafflesia buds to bloom. And when it does, it will wilt within a week.

MasyaAllah, SubhanaAllah, it was so beautiful.

While resting, we found out that the guy we met is actually a pilot. We talked about life, money and religion.

What are you doing now?

I am a pilot.

Wow! No wonder you are so fit. U are 20+ older than me and you have the stamina more than I do. What's your secret?

Just walk. I play golf so I walked a lot. Never use the caddy car. So each game I walked about 7km. Allah S.W.T. gave us this body so we have to take care of it. It is our responsibility to our self.

That time, I was thinking of myself. I felt ashamed because lately I am getting fatter. I did not take care of my body as much as I used to. It is our responsibility as muslims to take care of our body so that it is healthy. Clean our body etc.

Anyway, what both of you do?

We are teachers in UIA matriculation. I think this is the first time that I had a real conversation with a pilot. What is the work like? How does it feel?

Well, I am just a pilot. I carry people from point A to point B. Our jobs is similar but rather than carrying people from places you carry them through their life.

I was shocked to hear this from a pilot. Alhamdullilah, he reminded me how heavy the work of a teacher is. If he makes mistakes while flying, he will endanger others life. However if we teachers makes mistakes in educating and teaching a student, we might destroy his future, our student might end up taking other peoples life and even worse might become a treat to our religion.

I pray to Allah so that He will give us the strength to educate the students so that they will follow His Way. InsyaAllah I will try my very best. And I pray to Allah so that this pilot will be protected from danger, have a healthy longer life.

When he knew that I was a revert, he told us the story about a deaf girl who are interested to revert to Islam. He said that she hesitate because she do not want to change her name. Her name was given by her parents.

The pilot later explained that, the Malay muslims in the Jabatan Agama wants her to change name. He said that is 'bullshit', we are making our religion harder for the new reverts and the people who wanted to revert. She should just kept her name as it was. Infortunately, this only happens in Malaysia.....

I totally agreed, we only have to change name if it carries bad meanings. I respect this man in front of me. He is a pilot, yet modest and the best of all he knew his religion well.

We parted after having lunch. I felt so thankful I met this man. I always think that it is arranged by Allah. Alhamdullilah. I took his contacts. InsyaAllah I will contact him again.